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February 23, 2010

I'm (Vince) just speechless.

Last night I dreamed a dream, so vivid in colour and complexity, and the mood of it all made me believe I was actually there, the experiences were real and my decisions were a tangible force that I and those surrounding would be forced to reckon with. Though I was not myself, the dream-version representation of my subconcious was a schoalr, nay, a hero for the people, trumpeting knowledge and necessary methods that one ought to acquire to deal with a cold, cruel world. I was he: the poet, the intellectual.

I was Vince from Sham-Wow.

I was being interviewed (though it felt much more like a professional grill-sesh) about why I was able to portray such a sincere figure when it came to the multitude of products that I endorsed. “It’s simple,” I (Vince) replied. “I believe in the Sham-Wow. I believe in the Slap-Chop. I wear my heart on my sleeve, I’ve simply mastered the english language to properly explain why I think that this magic towel is so good at soaking up fresh cola spills.” Remarkable, my interviewers thought. And then it happened: I (Vince) snickered.


They had discovered me, the jig was up, the cat was out of the bag. “You’re right, I don’t care about this glorified onion-cutter that claims it can reverse the effects of tear-ducts. This job is just a gig till I get off my assault charges.” How do you sound so real then? they asked. “Easy! I’m a good liar.” This just got real. I (Vince) went into a spiel regarding how much I enjoyed a certain type of toothpaste tube. I talked about how I enjoyed the small sandy feeling I had between my teeth just after flossing, and how the ergonomical design of the tube made for easy application. They were stunned. And then I (VINCE) opened my mouth to a battle of epic proportions. You don’t brush your teeth! they exclaimed, and then we all had a great laugh.

The Point

Is it enough to pretend to be honest? Obviously not, as I (Vince) can attest to. Pretending negates the very definition of honesty. I’m fairly hot right now, because my honesty is being called into question regarding several areas of my personal and professional life, which are really the same thing because it’s all just one neverending trip to the rink. Whispers of my youth being a hindrance to my spring hockey team, questions regarding my methods and what I believe we should be teaching young hockey players, and frustrated parents because of a player’s choice to join my team or program. This dream had me questioning whether or not my slight arrogance is warranted when it comes to coaching , or if I’m just another cheap salesman trying to attach my name to up and coming athletes. This doubt lasted only for a second, however. Because I’m right. I’m right in my methods, because those methods include continually striving to learn more, and admitting when I’m wrong. Wait, you’re right when you’re wrong? Yes, and this is not a contradiction. I’m young, I’m passionate, and I’d challenge damn near anyone to deliver what I deliver. I’m honest to a fault, and I don’t ring my own bell nearly enough. This is my life, my career, and I can be whatever I want to do.


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